What does it mean to really deny yourself? There's a lot of misunderstanding and confusion over this. Some people think deny yourself means you go around putting yourself down all the time. That's not what it means. Some people think deny yourself means going around saying, "I'm no good. I'm worthless. I'm just a bunch of junk." You're not a bunch of junk. You are of value. You are of worth. You are significant. What does it really mean to deny yourself?
We must make it a daily habit. Every once in a while does no good. If you just deny yourself every once in a while, between times you're just as self serving as everybody else. Self denial is not one grand decision made once and for all. It's a daily decision of small choices, often painful choices, in which I choose to put other people or God's will ahead of my own. Sometimes it's invisible.
- When you can watch your peers and those close to you prosper and succeed without feeling jealous but rather rejoice in their success, then you know the meaning of deny yourself.
- When you can see other people attain goals you've failed to reach and see others receive rewards and recognition that you'd like to have without being envious, that's denying yourself.
- When you see other's people's needs being met with abundance while your needs are far greater and you don't question God or fail to be grateful for what you do have, that's denying yourself.
- When you choose to serve your wife or husband or children and put their needs ahead of yours, that's denying yourself.
- When you share your faith at work or school knowing that you may be insulted or put down, that's denying yourself.
- When you don't seek praise or fish for compliments and approval from others and when you can live without constantly being recognized and applauded, that's denying yourself.
- When you draw out the other person in conversation rather than telling your stories and opinions, that's denying yourself.
- When you tell the truth, even at personal expense, that's denying yourself.
- When you pay your fair share of taxes when everybody else is cheating, that's denying yourself.
- When you can accept criticism willingly and learn from it with a teachable attitude, that's denying yourself.
- When you place the comfort of others ahead of your own comfort, when you allow others to do a job that you know you're better trained to do, when you submit to authority over you in deference to God even though you don't understand or agree, that's denying yourself.
- When you can be content with less than the best of circumstances without griping or complaining, when you can accept interruptions that God places in your schedule and patiently endure irritations, that's denying yourself.
- When people break promises to you and let you down and you refuse to become bitter, when you are misjudged unfairly and your motives are questioned and you don't retaliate, that's denying yourself.
- When you are content to let God settle the score and content to wait for your reward in heaven, that's denying yourself.
The simple answer to self-centeredness if you haven't figure it out, is to deny yourself and put others before yourself.
